Here's the tragic reality—women make a slew of horrible, soul crushing mistakes out of fear of being alone. Our desire for connection and intimacy isn’t the problem—that’s perfectly normal. Moreover, psychologists highlight mental and physical benefits related to strong attachments and note that the healthiest among us enjoy a robust network of social support. The urge to bond is likely a hardwired fixture inherent to the human condition. Most of us crave relationship with a life partner, someone with whom to share our journey.
But sometimes our yearnings for intimacy take precedence over good sense and reason. We elevate connection to the extent we dread its antithesis—solitude.
That’s where the problem sets in—because when we’re afraid, we relinquish an enormous amount of personal agency and power. Cowering to anxiety we let panic cloud our decision making. We reason it’s better to be in a relationship—any relationship—than to be alone.
Even if said relationship crushes your spirit and robs you of you. We deny our true desires and lose sense of our authentic selves.
In essence, we live phony lives.
Let’s not do that. P.S. This caption is taken from my book, Single is the New Black: Don’t Wear White ‘Til It’s Right.
Image credit: Zach Guinta, Unsplash
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