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  • Dr. Karin Anderson Abrell

Playing The Blame Game

Blame others, they have control. Blame myself, I’m in control.

It’s so easy to blame.

If he hadn’t . . .

If she’d only . . . 

It’s their fault!

Yes, people do us wrong. It happens all the time.

But I can’t control what people do to me. I can only control what I do.

So when a situation goes awry, I try to resist the temptation to blame—rather, I look at the part I played.

Because that’s the part I can change. The part I can avoid in the future. The part that rests in my hands.

Blaming others makes me feel vindicated for a moment.

Blaming myself empowers me for a lifetime.

And just to be clear, I’m not suggesting we should shame ourselves—EVER! Blame and shame are two very different things.

The point is—owning our part puts the power in our hands.

Blaming turns over power to others.

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